What I’ve learnt about yoga from practicing yoga.

umzila kawulandelwa
8 min readAug 13, 2024

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I think I’ve mentioned this before but last year I went for a couple of TRE sessions which absolutely changed my life! I recommend TRE to anyone who’ll care to listen. I can’t explain the science of it especially cos I rarely care for the science of things I can actually feel in my body.

In fact it was TRE that helped me get IN my body! It was through those sessions that I suddenly started “hearing” my body. I’d always heard that our bodies speak to us but I was never fully attuned to my body’s voice. However TRE cracked me wide open and for the first time I could hear my body with SO much clarity!

TRE incorporates what I saw as easy yoga poses so that got me curious about what the effects of yoga would be on me if TRE could do THAT.

I’ve had the Down Dog yoga app since 2021 when I was first introduced to it on a healing retreat I went to. That time I found yoga too hard and I was really not interested. I couldn’t feel the benefits everyone was going on about.

Fast forward to late last year when I signed up for TRE. I still wasn’t sure yoga was as good as they said it was but having felt the effects of what I considered yoga moves, I was willing to give it a chance.

I even put yoga on my 2024 vision board. I was serious about trying it out this time around. Then January came. I remember I had my nieces over cos they slept over on New Year’s Eve.

In the morning my older niece (6yr old) asked if we could do kiddies’ yoga cos she apparently enjoys yoga. As the aunt who is yet to learn how to say no to these babies, I agreed to it.

I think I did 3 15min kiddies yoga sessions with my nieces that week before I could actually *feel* something in me. I was intrigued.

After my nieces left I started practicing 15mins of gentle or restorative yoga a day. It helped that Down Dog (the app) had a January challenge which I signed up for a few days into Jan. The challenge was to practice yoga every day.

I started with 15min sessions cos I didn’t want to feel discouraged. Eventually I felt I was comfortable with 15mins so I increased it to 20mins a day.

By then I wasn’t really feeling major changes in me. I just knew that it helped with my anxiety and general mood. When I got comfortable with 20mins I increased it to 25mins a day.

Oh and by the way on Down Dog you can choose your preferred level of difficulty for each practice. I started on beginner 1 which was someone who had never done yoga.

I had done yoga before but those sessions didn’t count for me cos I still felt like I did not understand yoga if there was even anything to understand.

As I got comfortable with each level I would also increase the level of difficulty. I am have now settled into intermediate 2 which is the level before the advanced and final level and I have found that 30mins a day is sufficient for me. And this is where the lessons begin!

Sure yoga can count as a workout and 30mins of working out a day is sufficient for me. I am not the kind of person who’d go to gym for 2hrs. That’s self flagellation to me. I love my body and I am not trying to punish it. I wanted my workouts to be a celebration of what my body can do not a punishment for it getting bigger. So yoga was low impact enough for me.

And that’s the thing I have learnt about yoga. It really doesn’t matter how long your session is. Yoga teaches me A LOT about humility. For real. It’s human nature to want to brag about how long we did something for. We want to get the most rewards for doing something the longest.

Yoga will give you what it has for you whether in 5mins or 75mins. So really. It’s not about you and certainly not about how long you do it for. Also yoga changes your life whether you’ve been doing it for 5yrs or 1month.

You are not better for having done yoga the longest. We all benefit the same however long we’ve been with it. That’s truly humbling. Yoga sees us for who we are without the frills and reveals that same self to us. Whether in 10mins or 90mins. So humbling. Truly humbling.

So don’t kill yourself trying to do it the longest. Just do it honestly. Man oh man. Honesty.

You cannot hide from yourself even if you tried if you are constantly on the mat. Yoga has a way of bringing you to you. Every time I lie in shavasana at the end of my practice I’m like “omg. So THIS is who you are, baby girl.”

I have come to know and understand myself better through yoga. Remember that thing I said about “hearing” your body? I just hear myself SO much clearer now with yoga.

I honestly don’t know the science of yoga. I don’t know how our bodies know to release all that information from a sequence of poses. I think they are called asanas. Again, I have *NOT* studied yoga I’m just sharing what has come out of my sessions I do alone in my pyjamas on my bedroom floor with an instructor on an app called Down Dog. So please don’t come for me about the correct terms and whatnot.

The magic of yoga for me has come from my own EXPERIENCE with it not anyone’s teachings. I am keen to go learn the history and meaning of it but right now I’m content with my lived experience which has been mind blowing on its own. Also I know that the day I decide to intentionally learn more about its roots and how it came to be I want to do it on Indian soil.

Anyway back to the lessons.

Yoga has taught me to love myself in my skin. Yoga is for anyone and everyone. For real. All you need is your body (in any shape) and solid ground. Don’t let the capitalists make you believe you need special yoga clothes or a fancy mat to practice.

You just need your body and the ground. A mat is for comfort. It doesn’t have to be a fancy mat. I sometimes practice yoga on my not-fancy picnic blanket at the park. However I mostly practice yoga on my bedroom floor in my pyjamas or in my underwear in summer.

It really is THAT simple. Capitalists are trying to make a quick buck out of us by selling us all those yoga products. None of them are necessary. Yoga pants are pants you feel most comfortable practicing yoga in.

You see how it also teaches one about simplicity? I love, love this thing! I honestly don’t know what to call yoga. I say thing cos it’s too magical, too powerful a thing for me to find one perfect word for it.

I feel one with myself cos of yoga. There were times I felt like Sanele was splintered across the universe. However now with my yoga practice I feel one with myself. Wherever I am, I am ALL there. My experience of life feels richer in depth and width cos of my presence. I’m just present in my life. I am here, experiencing it.

It also helps clear my mind. I find that it works even better than journaling for me. When I’m struggling with my many feelings, I get on the mat. 15mins in I’ll be feeling the difference already.

I’m also calmer cos of yoga. It just helps me feel centered.

Also I’ve realised that it’s not about perfection. You don’t have to be flexible or thin or fit to practice yoga. Anyone who wants to practice yoga can practice yoga. It also doesn’t matter who your teacher is. It’s not about the teacher.

If you can feel the flow in each session you are good. Yoga has flow to it. Each pose flows to the next. I love that a lot. I’ve started intentionally seeking out flow in my life as well. That helps me keep moving forward for real. As long as I’m in flow I can move in complete surrender. I can just float.

Of late I really feel like I exist in a state of surrender and I’m therefore floating and flowing through my life. It’s so nice to witness the flow of my own life. I see one thing leading to the other. Even when I don’t quite understand why something is happening I can trust that it’s meant to be if it’s flowing with me.

I understand the meaning of surrender better now that I have a solid yoga practice which I’m proud of.

I can’t do any of those fancy headstands the white, thin models are always shown doing. And that’s ok cos yoga is NOT about the poses and how well we do them.

I can’t say for sure what its main purpose is (was?) I just know that when I get on my mat, this is what I experience.

I was supposed to get a tattoo of a seated prayer pose on Friday however the tattoo studio I was going to was broken into the night before and their tattoo equipment was stolen.

Some people don’t understand why I’d want that tattoo barely 8months into practicing yoga and I’ll refer them to the point above. It doesn’t matter how long you’ve practiced for.

Yoga is the single most transformative thing I have ever gotten into oblivious to its power. Usually I research things before I get into them. Not with yoga. I felt my way into it. Perhaps that’s been my blessing in disguise?

That from the beginning my mind was never on the driver’s seat. It was the feelings in my body that brought me to the mat. Not some high sounding intellectual stuff.

God bless the day I decided to get into this! Never has my life been so impacted by something involving me alone. It’s usually someone coming into my life with life changing knowledge. However this time I flowed my way to it. What a gift!!

I love yoga for its simplicity. Anyone and everyone can do it. I know I suck at some poses and that doesn’t even matter.

It’s a practice we never have to get great at. There’s no such thing as being “great at yoga”. Yoga is just yoga. Which is why even kiddies yoga will still do in you what yoga does in us.

My mind is truly blown by this! It’s like my body is on loud speaker. I hear it loud and clear. Our bodies carry ancient wisdom and it is our duty to unlock that wisdom. I suppose we just have to find what works for us.

Yoga is my chosen way and I love it SOOO much!! s/o to Down Dog for their awesome, awesome app! I feel one with myself and what a gift it is to know I am here in this moment and ALL of me is here! ❤️

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umzila kawulandelwa
umzila kawulandelwa

Written by umzila kawulandelwa

I tell stories about my experience of being alive. Perpetually day dreaming of reading and writing by the beach. Dotting dog mom.

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