Goals? What’s that?
I had a session with my kinesiologist yesterday. After my session she recommended a vision mapping session with her. She’s also a life coach. She went on to explain what a vision mapping session is about. We’d set goals for me and see how I can get to where I see myself in 5yrs, assuming I even see myself anywhere in 5yrs.
I won’t lie, she mentioned GOALS and I went into full on panic mode. I have no goals for my life, at all. There’s NOTHING I want to achieve. I got home and started frantically googling “I have no goals or dreams, is that normal”? Google was trying to motivate me instead of answering my question, is it normal or nah?! I gave up my search after a while and decided that it didn’t matter if it was normal or not. All I know is it’s true for me and that is enough.
I always get frustrated at work when someone tries to give me tips on how to get promoted. I have no desire to be promoted either. I apply for jobs I want not jobs that will lead me to something I want. And when I stop wanting that job I move on to another job I want. It’s just how I live my life.
So yea, this goals thing stresses me out. Why do I need to achieve anything? I don’t feel like any achievement will give me anything I don’t already have. I’m content with my life as it is. No kidding. Well, since I got Ry I wish I had a stand alone house with a big yard he could play in. But still that isn’t a goal I’m working towards. I don’t NEED a bigger home. I live alone for fuck’s sake, well with Ry and he’s a dog please. My apartment is already HUGE. I am certain I’d have no use for more space. I’d probably just spend more money trying to furnish it and that’s not a good use of my money please.
I don’t have a 5yr plan. I don’t see myself anywhere in 5yrs time. That’s such a long time to try to imagine and just the thought of trying to design my life like that gives me unnecessary anxiety. My proudest moment to date was buying a house. Even then it wasn’t a goal I had and worked towards blah blah. I just woke up one day and decided I was done renting. The next week I’d put in offer for the house and now it’s mine.
I don’t believe in dreams. In the grand scheme of things dreams are just dreams. I used to have dreams and goals and none of them ever came true. Hmm I lie. My current car was once a “dream”. I had no solid plan of getting it. I just knew that’s the car I wanted next. When I was ready to buy I went and bought the car.
To me dreaming and setting goals feels like a waste of my already finite time and energy. We don’t get things cos we dreamt them. Material things need money. No one has ever asked to see my dream first before selling me anything.
Nobody bores me as much as someone who wants to tell me their dreams. I just don’t care. I know people with SO many dreams but none have come true despite their best efforts. I suspect life also doesn’t give a fuck about dreams. It’s just something we do to make ourselves feel like we are doing something without actually doing anything.
So yea. My secret is out of the bag now. Judge me. Or not. I’m super happy with my life! I LOVE it! I’m happy and mostly content. I’m not working towards any goal or dream. I’m just, you know, living my life. I honor my needs and wants as they come up. I do only the things that bring me joy. I spend time with people who fill my cup. I listen to music that makes me happy. I drink wine that makes me feel happy to be alive. I take my dog to the park and he’s happy too.
I open the window for my dog so he can stick his head out and feel the breeze on his cute, tiny face. I buy myself silly things that make me happy. I make myself nice meals. I make sure I am always warm cos I HATE being cold. I drink my water, get my 8hrs of sleep and sometimes 9. I buy books I hope I live long enough to read. I go on holidays as the need arises. I could go on forever. Point is? I am immensely in love with my life and wouldn’t change a thing about it! (Well, I would bring my boyfriend back. But that’s just about it) I don’t wish for anyone’s life. My life is my favorite life.
Turns out life without dreams and goals can be immensely beautiful too! Would you look at that!!
I’m no longer anxious about not having goals anymore. I don’t know if it’s normal or not and frankly, I don’t care. It’s my truth and I f’n love my life!